In this issue of Beacon Bits:
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You must complete the quiz by July 5 at 11:59PM EST. Winner will be drawn randomly on July 6 and notified by email.
Pride & Prejudice: When elders come out of the closet
Q: Recently, my elderly aunt came out to our family as a lesbian. She’s in her 80s and a resident of an assisted-living facility in the Mystic Valley community. My family is committed to supporting her, but we’re also concerned that she might suffer from prejudice and isolation now that she’s open about her sexuality. Are there resources for older LGBT folks? Are there steps I can take to make sure my aunt doesn’t suffer from discrimination?
A: I’m so glad to hear that your family is committed to supporting your aunt in her coming-out journey. For elders in particular, coming out as lesbian, gay, bisexual, or transgender (LGBT) can be a fraught process – not only because of life-long fears about society’s prejudice, but also because elders often depend on others for their care. It’s scary to think that the person who cares for you might be cruel or unforgiving about such an important part of your identity. Having your family’s support will undoubtedly make a big difference for your aunt’s emotional wellbeing.
I can understand why you worry, though. Nationally, LGBT elders face a number of challenges that other elders do not: access to basic healthcare can be difficult, especially for transgender elders. LGBT elders are less likely to have the same level of financial security as other elders, and are less likely to have family members to provide care or support. They also have fewer government protections.
At the same time, now more than ever, older LGBT folks are active and present in our community. AARP has just
launched a brand new LGBT Pride section of its website that includes a large number of resources.
The National Resource Center on LGBT Aging provides a vast array of resources on everything from mental health and racial equity to housing and legal support. The
National Gay and Lesbian Task Force, an advocacy organization, has aging-specific resources available. And the world’s oldest and largest advocacy organization for LGBT elders,
SAGE, just opened an affiliate in Western Massachusetts. These organizations will give you plenty of reading material to start with.
It will also be important for your aunt and your family to educate yourselves about your aunt’s legal rights and, if she has a partner, about her partner’s rights. For instance, new federal regulations require hospitals to allow patients to designate their own visitors. This means that hospitals can no longer prevent LGBT patients’ partners from visiting them. But other rights will be more complicated. Power of attorney, medical proxy, and inheritance laws, for instance, haven’t yet caught up with us. I would strongly recommend that your family consult an elder attorney with experience in LGBT issues.
The vibrant and growing LGBT elder community in the Mystic Valley region should prevent your aunt from feeling isolated.
The LGBT Aging Project is a local non-profit organization “dedicated to ensuring that lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender elders have equal access to the life-prolonging benefits, protections, services and institutions that their heterosexual neighbors take for granted.” They partner with elder service agencies to host special senior meals for LGBT elders in Roslindale (LBT women only), Salem, Cambridge, and Braintree. Other frequent activities include dances, concerts, lectures, and film screenings. Help your aunt locate some activities that feel comfortable and appealing to her. If you can, offer her transportation.
It will be essential that you figure out if your aunt’s current assisted-living facility has policies surrounding the care and dignity of LGBT residents.
Gen Silent, a recent documentary about Boston-area LGBT elders that I highly recommend, revealed that some elders have experienced mistreatment from caregivers due to their sexual identity. Ensure that your aunt’s home has a clear grievance policy so that she can report any mistreatment. Encourage the home to take part in the LGBT Aging Project’s Open Doors Task Force, a program training mainstream elder service providers to develop the institutional capacity to serve LGBT clients with dignity and respect.
And most importantly, listen to your aunt’s story and her concerns. Then tell her that you love her, that you respect her, that you are proud to know her, and thank her for her bravery.
Senator Katherine Clark is a Home Care Hero
Mystic Valley Elder Services and its professional association, the Massachusetts Home Care Association, have honored Senator Katherine Clark (Malden, Melrose, Reading, Stoneham and Wakefield) with this year's Home Care Hero Award.
Senator Clark was a key advocate for elders in the Mystic Valley region during the state budget deliberations this year, and secured additional funding for elder protective services as a result. Senator Clark has been a long-time supporter of elders in our community, and we are pleased to celebrate her contributions.
Mystic Valley Elder Services executive director Dan O'Leary, Al Norman of the Massachusetts Home Care Association, and Christine DiPietro, Director of Human Services for the City of Malden and Mystic Valley Elder Services board member, will present Senator Clark with this award tomorrow, Wednesday, June 29 at the Malden Senior Center during senior lunch.
If you would like to share a special message of thanks to Senator Clark, to be given to her on June 29, email your remarks to eryan@mves.org and we'll make sure to pass them on!
Walmart partners with Mystic Valley Elder Services to provide meals to elders in need
This spring, the Walmart Foundation awarded Mystic Valley Elder Services over $11,000 to help keep our Meals on Wheels program rolling. With this grant, we'll be replacing worn-out coolers, hot bags, trays, and other food delivery equipment. These greatly needed supplies will help us continue to deliver over 1,700 nutritious meals to the elders in our community each day!
Mystic Valley Elder Services is able to provide assistance and resources to elders, adults of all ages living with disabilities, and caregivers. We do this by partnering with elders, our community, and health care professionals. Our programs all need the support of our community to continue.
Please give a gift to Mystic Valley Elder Services today -- a gift to Mystic Valley is a gift to the thousands of people who find what they need at Mystic Valley every year.
